Stupid leg :(

So life has been pretty hard lately. I've pretty much been bed ridden because I can no longer bear weight on my right leg( my RSD leg) without being in tremendous excruciating pain in my knee and shin. I'm using crutches to get around the house and I really hate them. We are probably going to go get a wheelchair from a friend until I get better, at least enough to walk. This is hard for me because I've never been this bad to where I would have to use a wheelchair, it seriously sucks. I have an appointment with a neurologist today but I don't know how much good it will do. I hope you all are doing better than me.
With lots of love,
Taylor

"Pain pain go away, don't ever come back another day"- Quote by me

Flare and a Robot

I haven't update in like forever and it is because I have been in a really bad flare. I am having a really hard time doing anything and now my pain has spread all the way up my right side and into my chest. The pain is so bad it feels like when I look at my leg it should have knifes sticking out of it, cuts all over it, and its engulfed in flames. I haven't been sewing as much as I would like to either because I am trying to work on my school stuff . I only have one more class to complete to graduate but it's government and the pain makes it hard to focus. I did however make a robot plushie before I got  really bad. It took me a total of 14 hours to make because I made my own pattern from a drawing of mine and there are so many pieces to it, 43 to be exact. I will be selling them for $45 I think and even though they are part of my Hug Mes for RSD kids I won't be giving them away for free yet because of the time and money it takes to create them. I am extremely proud of this little fellah and would love to make him in other colors when I have the time again. Here are some pictures:)

 

The last one is for measuring purposes so you can see how big he really is:)

With lots of love,

Taylor

Quick Update

I am in Saint George again having more Calmare treatments done. I am praying that I start felling better soon. Last week I finished some Hug Me Pillows, here are some pictures.

This is the front of one I haven't finished completely yet.

The last two are for a friend with RSD and her little sister. I hope to eventually be able to customize each face to look like the person who orders them.
With lots of love,
Taylor

In the nightmarish land of a flare

For this last week I have been in an extreme flair. I spent last Friday and then this Monday and Tuesday in Saint George getting Calmare treatments done but for the first time it really hasn't helped. I can barely focus on anything and it was so excruciating to ride in the car on the way there and the way home . The roads are very bumpy and the vibrations were killing. I am also getting behind in school because I'm in too much pain to focus on it. I have managed to create another Hug Me Pillow though because it's one of the only things that keeps my mind off the pain.

 

This  is the front and back of it.

I apologize if this ended up being a pitty party post.

With lots of love and a hope for a pain free tomorrow,

Taylor

Hug Me Pillows Part 2 and update

The last two weeks have been very up and down in relation to my pain. I did experience some good days around the middle of last week which was really awesome because I was able to get some school work done and finish a subject. School work is one of the hardest things for me to focus on because of my pain and my pain is the reason I now have to do school from home. It's not so bad though, I can graduate a year early now:)

I've also been working on my Hug Me Pillows. I've gotten lots of orders which is fabulous:) I'm working through them slowly. My work goes slower because I only have a simple sewing machine that does not do embroidery letters so I have to either hand stitch the words "Hug Me" or use a super tiny zigzag stitch and form the letters the best I can. I've looked into getting an embroidery machine but would have to sell about 60 or more pillows to be able to buy one. I've come up with two new designs for them. A heart and one with a mustache. I was going to make every pillow have a smile but I just really loved the idea of a mustache. The mustache itself makes me laugh so I think it still counts:)
With lots of love,
Taylor

P.S. I don't know what happened to the color when I took the picture but with the one with the mustache the face is a deep red orange and the heart is red.

"I try to be so tough
But I'm just not strong enough
I can't do this alone, God I need You to hold on to me
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love
Savior, please keep saving me"

                 - Song "Savior, Please"

Hug Me Pillows

All of those who have RSD/CRPS know that there really is no relief to our daily excruciating pain. The only way I know how to live with my pain is to do things to keep my mind off of it. One of these things is sewing. I really enjoy it and love being able to create things. I decided that I want to share this with others who have RSD/CRPS. This is where I came up with Hug Me Pillows. They are 16 inch round pillows that are of my own design completely. Each one has a smile and a heart that says hug me. I have only made one so far but I have many ideas for more. I will post pictures of the pillow at the end. I chose these pillows, and the Hug Me, because at least for me when I'm in extreme pain sometimes you just need to hug/squeeze something. I actually went around Joann's craft store hugging pillows to see which one was the best for the purpose:) I chose the 16inch pillow but made my own because it didn't seem to have enough stuffing to squeeze. For all kids, and adults, with RSD/CRPS I will make one of these for them for free. I am currently doing this as a non-profit because I feel that I really need too. Because of that I am limited in what I can make and how many I can make and mail for free. If you want one and you do not have RSD/CRPS then I am selling them for $15. I would also accept donations from anyone who would like to help me out in giving these to people who are going through something as horrible as this disease and who just might need a smile. If you are interested or know someone who would like one please let me know. I would be happy to make them one. I can do them in lots of different colors. Currently I am working on one with three smiles, and one that looks like a ninja:)
With love,
Taylor

.

-"After the rain
You can look to the sky again
The clouds will give way
To the light of the sun
After the rain
You know that you've made it through
And you'll finally see the joy from the pain
After the rain"
        -song After the Rain

Others and Calmare Therapy - Update

The video from the previous post explains Calmare Therapy in general and shows Dr. D'Amato who is using the treatment on the East Coast.
Here is a video of my doctor in Saint George, Utah on the Calmare Therapy and someone he has treated. It's pretty cool and interesting.
Teen hit by lightning trying out new device to deal with pain - ksl.com

Recently I have had some severe pain days. Nothing less than a five and usually an eight or nine. It's been a bad week and not the happy and pain free Christmas I was hoping for. I've scheduled to go back to Saint George and have some more Calmare treatments done this Friday. I've come to realize that I will probably have to have at least one of these treatments a week for a while, or possibly the rest of my life, to keep my pain down to a manageable number. I was joking with my mom yesterday that I should just buy one of the machines and pull it along behind me:) I almost wish I could do this.

I was listening to a local Christian radio station and they were talking about new years resolutions the other day. I thought to myself what I would want to have as my resolution. The only thing that came to mind was to be healthier and be in no pain. I can't exactly control that so I am at a loss to what mine will be. Nonetheless I will be praying for a happy and pain free new year for everyone with CRPS including myself.



-"Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning"
                     -Josh Wilson - Before the Morning